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Something bad just happened...

But seriously! Imagine if you were addicted to crack...

and crack today was 30% off...

would you not think "heeeeey, good deal!"

That's all I'm sayin'... if I'm sayin' anything at all.

Anyway, Gutierrez (crack) from Aldo (dealer). They run reeeeaaaally small. I'm a 7.5 and I ended up with a 39 after a rather awkward conversation about doing an exchange "no I don't want heel inserts, or rubber pads for the bottom, or toe grips, or your first born. I'm not buying anything!" with a mean sales man/boy/betterlookingthanmegay.

And just in case you're wondering no, I can't walk in them.

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Get on these immediately if not sooner!

Just got them in the mail. REE-dick. BUH-nanas. UHmazing. All of the above. The flap in the front makes the opening appear larger from the side which...

everyone say it with me...

reduces the look of my cankles.

That's right ladies and gentlemen.

Sometimes Steve Madden gets it so right. The toe box isn't too big and bulky either which I was worried about. And the leather is sublime. AND they're on sale.

You're welcome.

via Steve Madden

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Looks like someone over at Ugg lit a fire under the design teams' collective ass...

I can't say I'm not intrigued, especially by the color combination on that last pair. But, for $995 I'm willing to let my curiosity fester. You?

via zappos